~Meg~

The Beyjongue Ollompucs (that's Kiwi for 'The Beijing Olympics)

2008-08-14T18:44:00.005+10:00

Yes, I have a Flight of the Conchords obsession. :D

Moving on... just bringing this up, since it's meant to be the event which brings us all together.. blah blah blah...

Ok, so my Top 5 highlights so far:

1.) seeing 48kg twigs lift 110kg+ above their scrawny (yet oh so muscley bodies)

2.) Stephanie Rice claiming this Olympics as her very own - as far as Australia is concerned

3.) Phelpsie... could he BE any more gorgeous?!?!?!? Normally I wouldn't cheer for a Yank since they all annoy the crap out of me (no offense my American friends), but he is THE most gorgeous human being of the Olympic Pool!! His smile could melt my heart like cheese at a fondue dinner party, and his humility is quite refreshing to see... from a Yank - (again, no offense my Americano friends!) One Aussie commentator put it nicely on Day 2 of the Games: "if Michael Phelps was a country, he'd be fourth on the medal tally right now!"

4.) our Aussie mens rowing team having a "watercraft malfunction" & veering ever so subtely into other team's lanes. (Not quite sure what happened there, but great to see an Aussie crew pull that one outta their hat.) Well done lads!

and last, but definitely not least...

5.) China... demonstrating in glorious form why they are the single most important environmental problem the world must face (AND DO SOMETHING ABOUT) in future years, second only perhaps to population growth.

Yes indeedy, China are showing the world how heavily industrialised they actually are (as if we didn't already know that), how commerce hungry they are, and how their contribution to the EGE is the most detrimental of all - with no signs of slowing down any time soon. Hopefully this will shed light on the role China plays in climate change... and puts pressure on them to fall into line with the rest of the civilised world in at least making some sort of attempt to at least "appear" to be doing something to help the world avert it's certain impending doom.

On that note: Hoppy Ollompucs Everywun! :D

Introducing Mookie

2008-06-15T15:20:00.002+10:00

With Roger (pc) getting on in years, his memory is fading a little & he's starting to act kinda funny sometimes. Add to that the need for a laptop for uni purposes, and you've got the perfect excuse for investing in a MacBook.

Introducing Mookie. Mookie has taken a little while to get used to as he thinks a little differently to Roger, but he definitely makes a lot more sense. And the freedom of being able to take Mookie with me anywhere is pretty cool, as now I'll be able to hoof on over to any library in Brisbane & milk them for all the information I can find, and take my research back home with me for further refinement. Ahhh, the freedom of Mookie.

Happy Birthday to Me!

2008-06-12T14:59:00.000+10:00

Another year older? Couldn't be. Indeed.

And what better way to mark the occasion than to have Fish #4 attempt suicide? I can't think of a nicer way to begin my 31st year of existence. In hindsight, it appears I may have filled Fish #4's bowl a little too high with water, enabling him to flip out of his bowl and onto the floor. Oops me.

Not sure how long the poor thing was flipping around in agony for, but he sure wasn't moving much when I found him sunny side up. Scooping him up into a dustpan he spluttered a few last rounds, before I dumped him back in his bowl, hoping for a miracle.

And behold the miracle fish!! He spent a few awkward hours composing himself, but he's as good as new, and has proved to be my new favourite (sorry Foosch) fish.

Jewel - Perfectly Clear

2008-06-03T14:40:00.003+10:00

Carrying on with my new tradition of reviewing Jewel's albums, here is my take on Jewel's countrified Perfectly Clear...

Stronger Woman - have listened to this one heaps since it's the single and all. I'm over it. I don't like the holier than thou message of the song. Moving right along to the new stuff! (6/10)

I Do - everyone has been going spastic for this song. I don't get why though. It's poptastic fluff. I'm really hoping for some of those great Jewel lyrics on this album. It's certainly a nice song, but I don't think it deserves the hype some of the fans have been giving it. (8/10)

Love Is A Garden - LOVING it, and have only heard the opening lines. Awww, the chorus is stunning. Yeah!!! This is the sort of country music I love!!! (10/10)

Rosey & Mick - ok, here we go with another much talked about song. To put into context though, it's never been one of my fave Jewel songs, so I don't much care what she does with it (unlike some Kilcherians who think she's ruined it). Soooo.... it's a great country song! I quite like it. And the faster tempo works the chorus really well. (8/10)

Anyone But You - first impressions are that this song would fit in quite well on 4BH. Hahaha! 4BH is an oldies station in Brisbane. And this is such classic 'easy listening'. Mum's around the world will like this song. Yeah, this is the most 'country' of what I've heard so far. (7/10)

Thump Thump - quite looking forward to this. Have only listened to a live version once before. Ooooh, there's some classic Jewel lyrics in there. Here comes the chorus... awww, it's so sweet. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. This is great! <Meg bops along> Ooooh, the chorus again. Yay!! It's still building up. Could this be a bridge? Awwww... happy Kilcherian! This song is so cute! Well done soldier! (10/10)

Two Become One - (pre-thought = do we freaking HAVE to go through this?) Urggh. Has put a dampener on this whole experience after the exhilaration of Thump Thump. If this was the first I'd heard the song, I would probably really like it. But it's NOT the first time I've heard it, is it? No! It's already been on an album. Is Jewel suffering from Alzheimer's? Come on mate... we wait all this time for a new record, and you rehash old 0304 crap AGAIN. Stop it. Stop it now! For the love of music, stop it NOW! Ok, so it's not that bad, but it will forever be an 0304 song to me, and it urks me to have to associate 0304 with Perfectly Clear. (6/10)

Till It Feels Like Cheating - moving on from that little outburst... this one takes the trophy for most country song on PC now. Doesn't really sound like a Jewel song. Not a bad song, mind you, just not completely Jewelish. This is my pick for next single. Country fans will like it. (7/10)

Everything Reminds Me Of You - oooh, I quite like this one. Another 4BH kinda song. And yeah, I like my 4BH these days. Nothing earth shattering, but nice. (8/10)

Loved By You (Cowboy Waltz) - I've loved this song since her Nashville Star performance. I think it was one of her finest live performances actually, so I kinda don't feel the need to hear her attempt to try to improve on it. It's a beautiful song really. Some of the instrumental backing is a little annoying to tell the truth, and not necessary. The vocal is a little too full too. Good song, but I still prefer the Nashville Star performance. (8/10)

Perfectly Clear - Obviously have heard this song before now. LOVING IT!!!! Like REALLY love it! I'm giving it a 10/10 because it's a 10/10, but I'd like to add that I think it's capable of 11/10. Extending the ending of this song, and building the crescendo a bit and a few extra strings could take this song to the skies! Capable of so much more, but still awesome as it is. (10/10)

Wrapping Up... Love Is A Garden, Thump Thump & Perfectly Clear are the standouts for me. Obviously Two Become One is the downer.

Rockin' Rockhampton

2008-04-15T21:24:00.000+10:00

Ahhh yeah. What could be better than spending 4 days in Rockhampton going to 12 hours of lab sessions per day and sleeping on a pillow that closely resembles a piece of cardboard?!?

My first residential for uni was a mix of torture & good times. The torture came in the form of piercing migraines while trying make sense of pretty microscopic imagery and sleepless nights, while the good times came from a small group of cool people I met & have kept in contact with.

To be fair, most of the lab sessions were cool, albeit hard to keep up with, but I could really have done without the toads & the wee samples. Looking forward to next semester... plants! Scalpels at the ready!

Steve Poltz @ The Troubadour

2008-01-08T23:43:00.000+10:00

Possibly the most exciting event of the year - unless aliens finally visit our fine planet, cause that would be pretty exciting too - is Steve Poltz coming to Brisvegas!!!! <insert hyperventilation here>

I dragged my good mates Shea, Piggy & Jen, Krystal & Kaleena along for the ultimate Poltz experience... watching Poltz up close & personal - the ONLY way to see Poltz!

Steve played a whole bunch of classic Poltz tunes, and a few newies from new cd's Traveling, and Unraveling. Shea was stoked to score a free beer from the man mid-show, and I managed to get a couple of my very own requests played (Tree Hugger & Leavin Again). After the show I was on my way out to go grab some moula from the hole in the wall to buy the new cd's which were on sale BEFORE the US got their grubby little paws on em... when I heard a very deep voice in my ear say "I love your shirt". Looking up, and up, and up (Steve is a very tall man and I am a very short gal) I realised it was none other than his royal highness himself admiring my Steve Poltz Trailer Girl shirt. I'm lucky I didn't pee myself!

As luck would have it, Shea was mates with 'Murray the Sound Guy' which gave us the perfect excuse to hang around with Steve, Milan (promoter extraordinare) & the Dead Letter Chorus (really good support act). Awesome night!!!

Highlights: Chinese Checkers, Light In Your Eyes, Sewing Machine, a very clever conversation Steve had with himself with the help of a pre-recorded mobile message, and lots of Poltz cuddles. He even called me 'sweet cheeks'... swoon!

Bad Blogger! Bad!

2008-01-01T13:26:00.003+10:00

I've been a very bad little blogger lately! Very bad indeed. It's more than halfway through the year, and I haven't blogged a single word. Have dated this entry 1/1/08 since that's around about when I abandoned the bloggers world. I'm so bad.

So yeah, I'm going to try to go back through the memory vault, and fish out a few stories for show & tell. (I had to go and mention fish, didn't I?!?!?)

You know I'm bad, I'm bad, you know it...

Wisdom My Butt!

2007-12-27T16:22:00.000+10:00

What's so freaking wise about freaking wisdom teeth??? The only thing it's wised me up to is the pure relief baby's feel when Mum slathers Bonjela onto their gums, and the pure joy codeine popping can achieve at times like these.

And don't even mention dentists! Even though it's only one tooth causing all the problems, I'll still have to sell a kidney to pay for it. I'm hoping it just goes away.

Over it.

Roger's Groove MkII

2007-12-20T16:07:00.000+10:00

Poor Roger's Groove. He knew it was only a matter of time before he was replaced by a younger Groover. He's done well to keep me entertained on my train rides for well over a year now. But when he began to have little hissy fits & do strange things for no particular reason, I knew it was time to go & find a more compliant Groove, and so I found myself putting a brand spankin new iPod Classic on lay by.

Not to hurt Roger's Groove MkI's feelings or anything, but MkII is far superior, and beautiful beyond description. He's sleek & black, and he plays video superbly, and shows me the covers of my albums, and has a swanky quiz thingy based on my own music collection.. and.. and.. and..

With 80GB of memory, I doubt I'll ever fill this baby to capacity & it's nice having my whole music collection at hand for those laborious train trips to work.

Kate Miller-Heidke

2007-12-03T15:47:00.000+10:00

After seeing Kate Miller-Heidke rip it up at the Aria awards, I decided it really was time to investigate this girl from Brisbane a little further. Kate Miller-Heidke is one of those artists I knew I would enjoy once I delved a little deeper, but had put off because once I find a talent I love I engross myself in their music for at least a month & don't listen to anything else the entire time.

Needless to say, 'Little Eve' is possibly my album of 2007 (with 'A Book Like This' by Angus & Julia Stone putting up a bloody good fight!). Trained as an opera singer, her talent is undeniable, but it's the lyrics of her songs that I love the most. She infuses her songs with irony & humour with the same sort of ease as Steve Poltz, and we all know how much I love Steve!

A couple of Kate vids for your (& my own) viewing pleasure...

'Words' - Kate Miller-Heidke

'Career Advice' (on Rockwiz) - Kate Miller-Heidke

Rain Shadow

2007-11-20T15:14:00.000+10:00

Sunday nights have been quite depressing since Grey's Anatomy finished up for the year. Could there be a better way to end the weekend & start a new week than watching Dr's McDreamy & McSteamy, not to mention Dr Alex (hello boys!!)? Sunday nights are traditionally my 'couch potato' night, but what's a girl to do when there's no Grey's Anatomy??? She goes channel surfing, that's what!

Which is precisely what I did 6 weeks ago, when I stumbled upon a quaint little Aussie drama called Rain Shadow. Originally I was drawn to the show because The Audreys do the entire musical score for the series, but it didn't take long to be drawn into the lives of the Paringa residents.

Lead actress Rachel Ward is enigmatic as vetinarian Kate McDonald, while Victoria Thaine as Jill Blake is refreshing & talented, and certainly has a very bright future, as she's one of those actresses you can't take your eyes off.

Meanwhile, is that REALLY Shane Withington as farmer Harry Greene??? The same Shane Withington who played Brendan in A Country Practice??? If it weren't for the crinkle in the corner of his eye, you wouldn't believe it, but it's him alright. And after Victoria Thaine, he is the standout of the series! Gary Sweet plays some sort of country mafia character, but I've never been much of a fan of Gary Sweet, and his character seems a bit fluffy in this series & could probably have been edited out entirely, but who am I to judge?

Now that Rain Shadow has finished, what the hell am I going to do for Sunday Couch Potato Night between now & when the next series of Grey's begins??? Thank Goddess for DVD's!

If I Were A Horse They'd Shoot Me!

2007-11-17T14:47:00.000+10:00

It's true! If I thought my Winter flu was bad (quote: .."the worst flu I've had in years"..)then this bout is surely the worst I've ever had in my life!

Perhaps it's the stress of quitting my crap arse job. Perhaps it's the stress of a certain boy being a huge arse pain in the arse. Perhaps it's bad karma for all the swearing I do. But whatever it is, it sucks goat arse!

It takes a fair bit for me to drag my arse to the doctor, but drag it I did - only to be told by Mr Indian Not Really Interested Doctor that I have bronchitis & the possibility of pneumonia developing. Ohhhh Goody. Antibiotics? Usually I scoff at the things, but in this instance I clung onto them like they were my life force in a bottle. Did they work? Perhaps. But I thank them not. All they did was alleviate the searing pain in my chest, making way for more snot than I have ever seen in my life!!!

I can count on one hand the number of boxes of tissues I've bought IN MY LIFE, but it would take TWO hands to count the number of boxes I've bought in the last frickin week! You would think that once the body had rid itself of the snot stores it has it could return to normal. But nooooooo, not this little snotty body. It has to keep producing copious amounts of the stuff for nearly TWO BLOODY WEEKS!!! All the while, I'm trying to learn everything there is to know about working in a Post Office! Yeah right!

Perhaps it's just what happens after your 30th birthday. Your body gives in to the fact that it's growing old(er), and you find yourself complaining about ailments like "old" people. Next thing you know, I'll be watching the ABC!!!!

You Can Take Your Job And...

2007-10-30T14:19:00.000+10:00

Today was a monumental step forward for me. Today I stood up & said "I really don't want to be a part of this anymore". Today I held my head high, and decided that they can take their crappy job & shove it fair & square up their...

Let's face it, retail work is not rocket science. It's not saving anyone's life. It's merely paying the bills for the poor schleps that work within it & feeding our consumerist society. There's not much difference between one retail job & the next, except that you can try to make the hours & location work in your favour. Which is precisely what I was trying to do when I cut back on my main job in order to take on a full time role in what was my second job. Essentially I swapped my first & second jobs around, so that my 1st job became my 2nd job, and my 2nd job became my first job. Confused? There's really no need. It's just what casual workers do.

Meanwhile, the 2nd job - which became the 1st job - turned out to be icky to say the least. The workplace could be harmonious & lively & even (gasp!) fun one minute, and turn horribly awkward & hostile the next. Throw a 'bosses daughter with a superiority complex' into the mix & you begin to understand why this morning I turned around & said "stuff it". It helps when your 2nd job employer - who was originally your 1st job employer - welcomes you back with open arms & a new position in an entirely different area.

I guess the moral of the story is to never burn bridges unless that bridge is leading you somewhere you never want to be ever again. How profound.

Angus & Julia Stone @ The Tivoli

2007-10-06T13:04:00.000+10:00

Another major musical discovery for me this year has been Angus & Julia Stone. Brought to my attention by my good friend Shea (for internet anonymity purposes I shall call her Shea Farter), I instantly fell in love with this brother/sister band. With Angus & Julia alternating the vocal duties throughout their EP's & album, it would be difficult to ever get bored with their musical offerings. Considering the multitude of instruments this pair can play, to call them 'talented' is something of an understatement.

When their tour was announced I was still just getting into the Stones, but as their Brisbane show got closer I became more & more excited at the possibility of seeing them perform live. It just so happened that the Tivoli show coincided with cousin Rob's annual pilgrimage home from Canada, so I booked him in for a 'mystery date'. And what a date it was...

Having met Rob for a bevvy or two while we waited for 'Shea Farter' to arrive (fashionably late as always!) we caught up on life & love (or lack thereof). Shortly after Shea & her posse of geeky science friends arrived it was decided that a bite to eat before the show was in order. I will never forget that slice of pizza. If not 'never', at least not for a very long time. Just a word of warning to anyone deciding to go to New York Slice Pizzeria in the Valley - be prepared to pay for one slice as much as you would a whole Pizza Hut pizza (with coupon of course). To say that Rob was a little mortified at his $6 slice of pizza would be an understatement, and with a couple of beers under his belt he let his frustrations known to the arsehole behind the counter. To be fair, the arsehole has a dead end job & every reason to be an arsehole, but no-one - I repeat NO ONE - disses my cousin & gets away with it entirely.

But this is not a post about pizza or family loyalties, it's a post about Angus & Julia Stone's fabulous performance at The Tivoli in the Spring of 2007...

Angus opened the show with 'Silver Coin' while Shea, Rob, myself & the others attempted to find a decent vantage point. Rob disappeared on a seek & find mission & reappeared with a tip off that upstairs was much better than where we currently standing. Kudos to Rob as the sound was so much better upstairs that I didn't care anymore about my less than impressive 5'2" (& a half) stature. It seems Angus & Julia Stone have a very tall fan base. Anyway, I barely laid eyes on Julia the whole night, but I did see Angus in all his hairy ape glory. Perhaps all the touring around the UK led Angus to develop a second coat or something, but lets just say he was much hairier than any photos I'd ever seen. But who gives a toss when he has such a beautiful voice!

While Angus was great, it needs to be said that in a live setting it's Julia who steals the show. She exudes personality on stage, and looks like she would be more comfortable performing before a crowd of hundreds than she would at a dinner of 8. Needless to say, Rob fell in love with her pixie-like dancing & carefree attitude... not to mention her trumpet skills & soaring vocals that could shatter glass (in a good way).

After playing most of their staple songs + many new songs from the album 'A Book Like This' + a rather unique version of Chumbawamba's 'Tubthumping', the evening ended with an all in singalong of 'Another Day', with Shea & I dancing on a nearby table. (?)

The Tivoli is my favourite place to see live gigs, and seeing Angus & Julia Stone there only enhanced my love of this great venue even further.

Discovering Kate Walsh

2007-09-10T12:31:00.000+10:00

Yes, I've been pretty slack updating this blog, but I'm attempting to rectify the situation ok. September '07 saw me stumble upon an English lass - Kate Walsh. No, not the Kate Walsh from Grey's Anatomy, but a talented singer-songwriter from Essex.

I discovered Ms Walsh via iTunes which did a fabulous job of recommending her album 'Clocktower Park' based on what is already in my iTunes library. Usually those sort of applications annoy the crap out of me, but since falling in love with Kate Walsh I do tend to take note of 'recommendations' which pop up time & time again. One listen to Clocktower Park & I went on a mission to find whatever else was available. 'Tim's House' & an iTunes 'Live in London' release did not disappoint.

Anyway, Kate Walsh is an awesome singer/songwriter/storyteller, and I simply can't get enough of her music - which is simple & pure. In a world where Britney can still have a hit song thanks to the overtime hours put in by producers & mixers, it's refreshing to hear a singer making music for all the right reasons.

Not sure we'll be seeing her tour Australia anytime soon, but a girl can hope can't she?

Since any searches of Kate Walsh on YouTube will mostly turn up results of the Grey's Anatomy actress (who, incidentally, looks quite similar), here are a couple of videos to get you started...

'Your Song' - Kate Walsh

'Don't Break My Heart' - Kate Walsh

Stuff, and... err, stuff.

2007-08-15T16:26:00.000+10:00

Apologies to the three & a half people who even read my stupid ramblings. I've been preoccupied with stuff. You know, stuff. Just stuff, random stuff. Stuff is like that... it just is. Stuff that it is.

If you think I'm procrastinating, you're right. I have nothing to say. I don't know about you, but I find that pretty sad. Actually, no... I've just thought of something. Has anyone seen that great new stuff (there I go with 'stuff' again!) that sanitises your hands - WITHOUT washing?!?!?! There's a couple of different ones on the market, and I'm pretty excited! I'm borderline OCD when it comes to germs. I openly admit that. And here's a product which could either help me with that, or perpetuate the problem further. Like all of life's great mysteries, we'll just have to wait & see.

That's the moral of today's story: we'll just have to wait & see.

I'm sorry, that's I've got right now. Liquid hand sanitiser. YOU try to figure me out, and see how far you get.

Achooo...

2007-06-15T18:31:00.000+10:00

Urghhhhhh!!!!!!! I've been hit with the worst flu in years this week, courtesy of my beloved Justin last weekend. Grrrr...

To be fair, his flu was quite different to what I'm experiencing, so it's highly likely that there's no correlation between him & my feeling like shite at the moment. It would be nice to once again breathe through my nose, but I can't be sure if that will ever happen again. I'd like to lose this constant chill running through my bones, and I'm sure it'll happen one day - I hope. Sleep time is the worst, I wake up gasping for air from burrowing my head beneath the covers to prevent inhaling cold air but managing to suffocate myself in the process.

Oh woe is me. :(

30 Green Bottles Sittin' on the Wall...

2007-06-12T18:41:00.000+10:00

Ok, so I'm officially 30 years old. Let's move on...

I had a fantastic weekend to celebrate the event that shall not be mentioned again. The handsome Justin arrived on Saturday a little worse for wear, but nevertheless eager to enjoy our time together on this auspicious occasion. To his credit, Charlie never once complained about his bad case of the flu the whole time he was here. First up I dragged him over to West End for some Turkish delights on Saturday night at the Ottoman Cafe. Mmmmmm, Turkish Dips.

On Saturday we headed over to Bid & Peter's (a little late, but better that than never right?) for a lunch of the famous lasagne which turned me back from vegetarian to meat-eater on my 21st birthday approximately, if not exactly, 9 years ago. True to her style Bid had not gone about the task half-arsed, and presented me with a lovely millinery ensemble to wear for the afternoon. Yay... (not). I'd like to think I carried off the look with a certain amount of elegance, style & panache. Weekesy's first contact with 'Fam Gorsch' seemed to go well, and I'm sure opinions of him were most favourable as he's pretty damned lovable - even if I may say so myself.

Much of the rest of the weekend was spent eating & drinking to excess, and who can argue with that? Plans for a BBQ on the Wynnum Esplanade on Monday were brought to a halt by the fact that the public BBQ's are not electric, and require massive amounts of effort to stoke a fire. Ooops me for not checking that out earlier. The marinated steaks had to be content with stove top cooking, which I hate to say just didn't measure up to standard. Meh.

Today rocked around all too quickly of course, and after having breakfast brought to me in bed (a first let me tell you!) I was given a beautiful bracelet by Justin which I just love!! It's nice to have a little reminder of him on my wrist everyday, and I just wonder HOW a male could get it so damned right. Me thinks he's a keeper!

I also got a camera from Dad & Marg + The Lynch Mob for my birthday, so everyone can look forward to a higher quality of pictorial content on my little blog here (all three of you who read it that is! Hahaha).

As always it was hard to part company with Charlie @ the airport, but all in all I had the most awesome & memorable initiation into the thirty-something crowd this past long weekend.

Take Three

2007-06-06T15:55:00.000+10:00

I am pleased (and slightly nervous) to announce the latest addition to my humble home & ever evolving menagerie - Foosch.

I was supposed to wait until Justin came up this weekend to replace Carlotta with a new fish, but I decided that considering my track record with these damned creatures I didn't want to associate something that could potentially (and let's face it - inevitably) die withing a few months, with Justin.

So a trip to the local pet store (that you would think I would avoid like the plague after the last two disasters) saw me carting home a beautiful new fish, aptly named Foosch. The name came about from not wanting to name this one, so I've just been addressing him as Fish - albeit with a distinct tone to my voice - and he seems to respond pretty well to this. Considering my surname, it just seemed appropriate to incorporate the 'sch' thing for sentimentality. He's a pretty happy chappy actually, possibly even more so than Garfunkel. Very animated (as opposed to Carlotta in her final days/weeks... but let's not talk about ok), and always up for a cheery exchange of greetings as only fish & human can do.

Luna has even taken an interest in Foosch. Maybe being a darker shade she can see him easier. (?) And he's bigger too. And quite robust. So I'm hoping he's strong enough to last a bit longer than Funky & Carlotta. I think I'm even more fond of Foosch than I was of Funky, and certainly more so than Carlotta who never really had a chance to be honest, God bless his/her little fishy soul.

Let's hope this is my last post re: fish for quite some time.

P.S. Note to Bid: sooooo not interested in those worms lady! Blurgh!!

Countdown = 1 week

2007-06-05T18:30:00.000+10:00

Oh dear.

It hit me like a Mack Truck this morning that I have just one week left that I can call myself a "twenty-something". I vaguely recall having minor freak-outs about previous birthdays before (I think 26 & 28 were a bit hard to take for whatever reasons I had at the time), but nothing could prepare me for the epiphany I had this fine morning.

I've become accustomed to catching myself throwing all those crap cliches my folks used to bombard me with towards the current youth of today, and receiving the obligatory teenage eye roll in return. I've certainly been guilty of peering into the mirror for an indefinite amount of time looking for new wrinkles & lines as well. But I have never ever thought of myself as "almost 30". Every single person I've told about my impending milestone comments on how I do not look 30 by any standards. Age guesses range from 21 to 27 tops, and the lovely young man at the bottle-o a few weeks back who asked me for ID was adequately rewarded with my biggest, friendliest smile. And to be sure to be sure - I hardly have the maturity level to call myself a thirty-something!

So what is all the fuss about? I'm not quite sure yet, but I'm freaking out just the same thankyou very much. I'll be savouring every last moment I have as a "twenty-something" for the next week, and hopefully the world doesn't spontaneously combust between now & when I find out what it really feels like to be <gasp> THIRTY!

Fishing for Sympathy

2007-06-03T14:55:00.000+10:00

I can't do it anymore!!!

I can't watch Carlotta the Sexually Confused Fish die a horrible, slow, miserable death ANYMORE!!!! While I've not formed a definite opinion on euthanasia as yet, I must admit that today - at approximately 6am - I made the decision to end a life. And an animal life at that!

You have to understand how difficult this is/was for me. I'm an animal lover if ever there was one, but if you could have seen poor Carlotta fight for every breath he/she took in the end, you would have flushed him/her down the loo too!

The last week of his/her short but blessed existence was nothing short of tragic. He/she would lie on the rocks on the bottom of the bowl, and only surface when Mum shook the bowl to check for signs of life. Every day I would come home and hope to whatever God/Goddess presides over domestic marine life to spare him/her the pain and end it quickly. But alas, this was the fish that WOULD NOT DIE!

So this morning before leaving for an early start at work, I made the swift decision to do the 'right thing' and cease the suffering of my beloved #2 fish, Carlotta. I wasn't about to tip him/her into the ground and allow him/her to cough & splutter & gasp for breath etc etc... so it was decreed (by myself) that by flushing Carlotta down the loo, "hopefully" the shock would end his/her suffering quickly through shock.

And thus the life of Carlotta was brought to a benevolent close. Please pause for a few moments in remembrance of Carlotta, the fighter fish of indeterminate sexual orientation.

Brooke Fraser @ The Globe

2007-04-30T15:54:00.000+10:00

I was lucky enough to see Brooke Fraser (one of my favourite chick singer/songwriters) last Thursday night with Shea (one of my favourite chicks in general), at The Globe in The Valley. Don't know where The Globe is? No, neither did we. We both had our suspicions though... Shea thought it might be the old theatre up New Farm end of Brunswick St, which last time she saw it was a construction site, while I thought it might be where the old Valley Twin Cinemas used to be. To cut a long story short, the construction site is STILL a construction site, whereas the Valley Twin Cinemas is now The Globe... chalk one up for the chick who usually has little to no idea of anything!! Go ME!!!

So to cut a short story long, Shea picked me up from Southbank's 'Hooker Boulevard' after work and we headed into The Valley with Shea screaming like a banshee at cars, buses & pretty much anyone who got in her way. She really IS a great driver, but she was hungry, so give her a break ok?

After a couple of beers at the RG, we headed up to The Globe where we thought it would be a straight run into the place. How wrong we were. Three quarters of an hour after the start time we found ourselves in a queue which Robbie Williams would be proud of. Who knew Brooke Fraser had acquired such a fan base in Brisbane?!?! And so we waited... and waited... and waited... and took turns running up to the train station for bathroom breaks while waiting to get into the place.

It would be amiss of me not to mention the fact that Spargo, one of our internet friends we are still yet to pin down, passed the queue but missed us completely. Typical loserpants BOY! It would have been a great surprise to have some supposed stranger sidle up to us and say G'day, but it was not meant to be and he passed us by without recognition.

When we got inside, it turned out to be a blessing in disguise that we didn't have long to wait for the main attraction because the venue was really hot & stuffy. Having said that, it was a pretty good spot all in all with a really nice, intimate vibe about it. I can absolutely see Steve Poltz performing there... but if that were to happen I would be lining up for hours before hand, and make sure I was front row center, with a banner, autograph book, and pom poms etc etc...

Ok, so getting back to Brooke... she was FANTASTIC!!! One of the few artists who are heaps better live than on any CD they've released. She's so quietly spoken, and so ridiculously sweet you can't help but love her. You can be pretty sure of the quality of a singer/songwriter when the backing musos don't appear to be terribly challenged, but the music is still impeccable. She is definitely one very talented chicky babe!

Of all the songs, the stand out was definitely Albertine, the title track from her current album. The story behind the song is truly touching, and she certainly gets her message across. You really get a sense of who Brooke Fraser is when you hear that song. It's a song you simply can't forget.

Sunny Canberra Days

2007-04-17T14:27:00.000+10:00

Guess who's in trouble again for not blogging for a while?

Quite simply, I haven't had any assignments due, or tax returns to do, or other pressing issues which need to be avoided at all costs, but today's deadline for an assignment I've barely begun means I'm back here in blogland once again. And yes, I will tell (almost) all about my trip to Canberra a few weeks ago.

A Brissy escape had been long overdue, and it was decided that a trip to Canberra was in order to hang out with my new favourite person Justin, who I meet through cousin Rob's forum Tete a Tete over a year ago. After way too many hours spent chattering away on MSN it became clear he was just someone I should meet (and vice versa I guess). I was originally meant to go down to Canberra for the Australia Day weekend, but I chickened out. I mean really, who flies to another state to stay with someone they've been net-mates with a while without knowing if they'll love or loathe each other at the end (or even worse, at the beginning) of the 4 days??? It's crazy right? Right. But eventually curiosity got the better of me, and if Rob can embrace the internet age, then why can't I? You're my hero Rob!! Hahaha! So I flew down for the Canberra Day weekend with much antici...pation.

As it turns out, Justin is every bit as lovable in person as he is on the phone etc, and we had an excellent time! The flight down was a bit dodge, I don't know if it was the flight or the nerves making me feel nauseous but it wasn't the greatest of flights that's for sure. I was seated over the wing, so every dip & turn was measured by how very 'unhorizontal' we were. I was close to barfing a few times, but managed to keep it together. Justin was waiting for me at the airport, and truth be told I think he was more nervous than I was, poor guy.

Friday night was a quiet night, with me introducing him to wonders of the movie Cocktail. Hahaha. He'd never seen it, and this is a crime, is it not? When it had finished I think his exact words were "well it wasn't as bad as I thought it'd be". Nevermind that it was far worse than I remember it, but anyway... Next time, it's going to be Dirty Dancing! How someone can live through the 80's & 90's without ever seeing Dirty Dancing is completely beyond me, and I feel it my personal duty to share the story of Baby & Johnny with Justin. He'll thank me for those 2 short hours at Kellerman's!!

So Saturday we set about being tourists, and ended up at Questacon Science Centre where we got in touch with our 'younger' side. My nephew Benny would go BERSERK in this place, with all the cool things to touch & see & make happen. We went to see the Woody Allen flick "Scoop" that night too, after we'd scaled the shopping center trying to find a way in to the cinema!!! Oh, and did you know that the supermarkets in Canberra have these MASSIVE grog stores that are open till midnight! It's crazy! Very bizarre.

Sunday's highlight was definitely trying our hand at ten pin bowling. My gawd I sucked goat arse!! Allow me to build a mental image of my bowling style... take the ball (the pretty pink one of course), run up to the point of no return, stop, swing the ball back whilst laughing hysterically, then hurtle the ball down the lane with what little energy you have left at the end. Watch the ball as it meanders down the lane and either drops off into the gutter of casually clips one or two pins before dropping off the face of the earth only to return to the user to do it all again... much to the amusement of the cute opponent watching this spectacle. You know you suck goat arse when the competition advises you use the kiddie guard rails for the next game. What I lacked in technique, I'd like to think I made up for in entertainment.

Such professional sporting prowess should be rewarded, and as such Justin took me to this place he's been raving about for months - Rubee's - for an afternoon delight. It proclaims to be 'custard', but I can tell you right now that it's ICE CREAM. These crazy Canberra people don't know their custards from their ice creams. Weirdos! It was indeed delicious custardy-ice cream nonetheless. Mmmmm, Rubee's...

Justin spent Sunday afternoon watching a really warped dvd, while I snoozed... before we headed out to the pool for a relaxing drink and a lazy swim. My personal chef cooked me a yummy dinner and we had a quiet night in watching Biggest Loser & Grey's Anatomy (I wasn't about to miss Grey's!!!!) before getting an early night in anticipation of our visit to the zoo the next day.

Cut to the next morning, and we awaken to not only grey skies, but thunder & lightening & torrential rain - the whole shebang! NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I had been looking forward to going to the zoo & FINALLY seeing Jama the King Cheetah for sooo long, and the day had finally come & Mother Nature pulled a swifty on me. Grrrr, not happy. Any normal person would cut their losses & go 'nup, not going out in this weather'... but not Justin Weekes. We had planned to go to the zoo, and to the zoo we did go. As it turns out, it was a great day to rock up there. The rains lifted for most of our visit, and we basically had the entire zoo to ourselves! Perfect!

Unfortunately, most of my photos from the zoo are substandard to say the least, but there are a couple of half decent ones that I can post. My favourite is of course of the King Cheetah & his playmate. He was truly an awesome sight to behold. This Big Cat lover was not disappointed with the National Zoo & Aquarium's cheetahs, tiger, lions, cougars & a serval. Mr Serval didn't want to get out of bed on such an overcast day, but we managed a brief glimpse of him, and Mr Tiger was too busy chomping on his carcass to be bothered too much with us, but he was beautiful in any case. I was most impressed with the personality of the cougars... I'd never seen cougars up close before and they were way cool. But it was the cheetahs that stole the big cat show for me. King Cheetah 'Jama' was every bit as gorgeous as his photos on the website, and when we went back for a second look at him he was having his picture taken with a couple of very lucky (and very rich) tourists, so that was cool to see.

After the zoo, we carried on to the aquarium which was cool too. Some of those fishes are so freaking pretty while others couldn't be uglier if they repeatedly rammed their heads into a piece of coral. But the turtles stole my heart. Turtles are awesome. Go turtles!!! (Not Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles though... didn't we see enough of them when we were young'un??) But I digress...

Monday night was pretty low-key as Justin had to be up for work at 1am or something horrible like that, and after being randomly chosen for an explosives test at 6am at the airport I was on my way home. We had an awesome weekend, and I'm heading back down to Canberra next weekend for another visit.

To Justin: 'Cheers Darlin' for being such an excellent host and making me laugh NON STOP for 4 days. It was a weekend I'll never forget!

Obsessed with Damien Rice

2007-03-12T15:45:00.000+10:00

Once in a while, an artist comes along that you just "click" with. Damien Rice is one such artist for me! I can't get enough of his tunes these days. I've even come to embrace Lisa Hannigan for all that she contributes to his recordings & live performances. They have a great collaborative thing going on.

Big tah's to my friend Justin for introducing me to the wonders of Mr Rice... before his gentle push in the right direction all I ever knew of Damien Rice was 'Blower's Daughter' from the movie 'Closer'. I remember thinking it was one of the most amazing songs used in a film when I first saw it, but there is so much more to Damien Rice, and the more I hear, the more I lurvvve him.

He's Irish too. To be sure to be sure. And Irish blokes are way sexy. Hahaha! Damien was in Oz recently, but his shows were unfortunately sold out by the time I got wind of it. Such is my luck with these things. I found out about Jewel's last tour AFTER she'd been & gone, and Tori Amos was sold out before I had even heard a whisper of it. Same story with the love of my life Steve Poltz, who played The Troubadour 2 days before I saw the poster in the Valley! I think I was destined to live my life well behind the times. Oh well, I'm content to spin my Debbie Gibson & Spandau Ballet LP's while the rest of you lot ham it up with the latest releases. But occasionally, I find a contemporary artist I am at one with.

I think my favourite Damien Rice tracks at the moment would have to be: Dogs, Cannonball, Amie, Older Chests & The Animals Were Gone... as well as Blowers Daughter of course!

Here's a little "Rice Treat" for those who are as yet unfamilar with the lad...

Wimbeldon

2007-03-08T19:50:00.000+10:00

Today I speak not of tennis... but of Wimbeldon's other finest... THE WOMBLES!

Does anyone remember these funky little dudes? I have fond memories of my sister & I sitting down to watch The Wombles after school. I remember part of the intro too: "The Wombles of Wimbeldon common are we...". They also influenced the playfully derogatory phrase: "Ahh, ya Womble!" - used often by Caron & I.

Ok, so it isn't the most sophisticated animation you'll ever see, but it definitely has a certain charm about it. And one could say The Wombles were pioneers of an environmentally friendly attitude to living. Recycling was their forte!

So today I salute The Wombles of Wimbeldon...

Strike Me A Ray!

2007-03-02T19:38:00.000+10:00

This week I've embarked on a mission I've always wanted to have a crack at. Those who know me half well will know that I have terrible tan lines. And I'm not talking 'normal' tan lines like bikini strap lines etc... I'm talking truckie-esque shirt lines, and lines on my feet that make it look like I'm permanently wearing my thongs even when I'm actually barefoot. Fairly unsexy to say the least. This is the only picture I can find to demonstrate my point, and even though it shows pretty bad shirt lines, it's only the tip of the iceberg unfortunately.

SO!... after working up the courage to walk into my local solarium place I found myself armed with all the nuts & bolts information on how to go about dealing with this problem. The chicky babe there is friendly beyond description, and I felt at ease enough to front up for my first session on Monday. To my surprise, there was a man at the desk this time, and I started to fret & get the shakes a little. "Where the hell is my friendly chicky babe?" I thought, and as if I had summoned her with my anxiety, she appeared. Phew! Mr Man then proceeded to look me up & down and inform me that I have great skin for tanning and I'll be stoked with the end result. Yeah yeah, we'll see matey...

After being given the Ten (or so) Commandments of Solarium Tanning, I locked the door of the room behind me and proceeded to nude up (well if I'm going to go to the trouble of getting a decent tan, I'm not going to stuff it up by having a grundies tanline, am I?!?) Then I popped my funky little goggles on, and jumped into the standing solarium machine and closed the doors (GENTLY - one of the commandments) behind me. I don't know what I was expecting during my initial 6 minutes in there, but whatever it was I was surely disappointed as it was as boring as batshit! Ho hum.

It's really funny looking back on how apprehensive I was about the whole thing, now that I am a seasoned professional and all, but it's always the unknown that's scary, isn't it.

I've had three sessions so far, and apparently the colour doesn't really start to come out until the 7th or 8th session, but I can already see the results. I look down upon my once iridescently white body and see the slightest hints of brown coming through. Now THAT'S exciting. By closing of next week, I hope to resemble something like a Chico baby. Or not. I'll settle for slightly less obvious t-shirt & thong lines. I've wised up a bit as far as the face goes too... I slather suncream on my face & lips as I don't want to go all leathery and Donatella Versace like. Ewwww! Somehow I don't think I'll get THAT addicted to the solarium though, cause really, it's sooooo bloody boring standing in that thing for 8 minutes!!!!

Paris Hilton Exposed

2007-02-05T15:01:00.000+10:00

Looking for the latest nude picture or sex video of Paris? Please depart now.

My expose today is focused on music, or in this case - the lack thereof. Without wishing to link the likes of Paris Hilton to the wonderful, amazing & inspiring talent that is Mr Steven J J Poltz, I must share with you all a video I came across today.

(My) Steve features in this very interesting explanation of how some popstars are 'made'. It immediately made me think of Paris Hilton. (Steve: I promise this is the first & LAST time I will associate you with Ms Hilton!!)

To understand exactly what I'm getting at here, I think you should watch each video in sequence. I think my point is then made 'crystal clear'.

Bridges Over Troubled Water

2007-01-29T16:54:00.000+10:00

Forgive me if I choke up while writing this. It's been quite a sad week for both myself & my Aunty Bid. We've both been having fish troubles for a few weeks now, but being the optimistic gals we are - have been hoping for miracles to save our beloved cousin Siamese Fighting Fish 'Simon' & 'Garfunkel'. The miracles never came.

Simon blew his last bubble over a week ago now, which was very sad news indeed. Cobie & Rob gave him to Bid as a gift, and knowing the joy that little guy gave her makes it all the more sadder. But he had issues with food, and eating disorders & fish do make for a happy outcome. So with great sadness & reverence Simon was laid to rest in the garden last week.

Meanwhile, Simon's cousin Garfunkel wasn't feeling too good either. The last couple of weeks he'd been getting slower & slower, until it finally got to the point where he just couldn't be bothered even swimming around. If I did manage to rouse him, he'd dart around the bowl in a psychotic state for a few seconds which was very difficult to bear witness to... he was literally going crazy.

Anyway, last Wednesday I tried to feed him before leaving for work but he just wasn't interested. I knew it was only a matter of time from then on. Needless to say, I came home that night to find Funky had passed away during the day. After the initial shock, I dissolved into a flurry of tears & finally buried him in the garden beside my bedroom door late that night. I told him I was sorry I couldn't save him, and went to bed with a migraine. Thanks to my friend Justin for putting up with a sniffling phone call that night.

But, like any sad story, there is always a silver lining. So, like a 'Bridge Over Troubled Waters' both Bid & I have found ourselves new fishy friends to occupy our empty fish bowls...

Simon's bowl is now home to 'Barry' (he was bought on a 'Mundie'), and while I think he & Bid are still 'getting to know each other', I hope he gives her as much joy & chatter as Simon did. Hopefully, he doesn't have as many issues with food either because fish psychiatrists are VERY hard to find these days.

Meanwhile, after a 5 day grieving period, I finally found the courage to enter a pet shop today and take a look at the Fighting Fish available for adoption. They had one electric blue dude swimming around, but unfortunately it was just too painful to look at him... he reminded me too much of Garfunkel, and although I've come a long way in accepting his passing, I'm not yet at the point where I can look at his exact 'double' without thinking of him. But in a little bowl above that guy was a swish little dude who caught my eye. Peach coloured body with darker accents & polka dots make for a very pretty fishy indeed. Handing over my $7.95, I took this beauty home. I have it on good authority that Fighting Fish in pet shops are exclusively males, but that just doesn't make sense, because this little fish is just so pretty! He even swims with a certain feminine flare, and eats quite daintily too. What's going on here? It just doesn't make sense that he could be a boy. And then it hit me...

... my new fish is indeed *takes deep breaths* GAY! Yes, it's true. It's the only logical explanation. It explains the unique colouring, the refined table manners & graceful nature - and especially the polka dots! I immediately flew into a very dramatic fit: "WHAT DID I DO WRONG?" etc etc... but after I'd calmed down I realised it wasn't my fault, and nothing can be done about a fish of homosexual tendency. Accept it, and move on Meg. And so I have. With dignity.

Circumstances being as they are, I have named my new fish Carlotta. He's settling in well, and Luna doesn't seem to phased by him at this early stage. She got quite used to having Funky around, and I'm sure she'll accept this new (albeit slightly 'queer') addition to our humble family.

And so our fish adventures continue...

Dad Turns The Big Six Oh

2007-01-15T12:52:00.000+10:00

My Daddy dearest turned 60 on Friday, and such a milestone could not go past without a little celebrating. So, on Saturday I piled into Bid & Peter's Bundaberg bound car. It's not a bad little drive up to Bundy, and there was certainly a heap to catch up on. Arriving in Bundy, first on the agenda was finding Bid & Peter a motel for the night. You would think having spent over half my life in this town, I could be of some assistance. You would be mistaken. Nevertheless, they found a comfy bed for the night, and it was over to Caron's to get ready for a BBQ with the guest of honour.

As the head of the decorations committee I set about blowing up balloons (with a little help from the troops), but I'm not sure why we bothered. All but 4 balloons had burst before Dad even arrived. But it looked pretty for a brief moment in time. Poor Abbey (the big bad Rottweiler) was a nervous wreck for hours. I think she's now mentally scarred for life. The sight of a balloon will have her cowering in the furtherest corners of the yard from now on.

Dad arrived, and literally fell over his suprise guests hiding in the hallway. As dad said, a suprise is still a suprise wherever it happens. Wise man that Daddy of mine. Attempts at family pictures were thwarted by baby Caitlyn who seemed to not like the camera as much as her big brother. Great Aunty Bid was only too happy to provide soothing cuddles, and Caitlyn seemed content with this arrangement.

The family then sat down to pray to the Ocean Gods by sharing the Holy Bucket of Prawns before tucking into a yummy BBQ prepared by Caron. Her Zesty Lamb Cutlets (a recipe stolen from one of the Sunrise crew I have been told) went down a treat, as did the now infamous Wombok Salad... amongst other culinary delights. A good night was had by all, with Benny providing ample entertainment.

So Happy 60th Birthday Daddy Dearest! Here's to next 60 years.

Step aside Dalai Lama...

2006-12-30T13:40:00.000+10:00

... because 'Hollisterchic102' has muscled in on your niche market!!

Randomly trolling through YouTube today, I discovered a true visionary of the 21st century. You can keep your Buddha, your Confuscious, your Da Vinci & your Keats. Hell you can even keep your Allllllmighty God, because I now subscribe to a new gospel, the Word of Hollisterchic102. As I eagerly await another installment of Hollisterchic102, I would dearly love to share with you all her commentary on "The Hotness Factor".

Sit back and enjoy 3 minutes of pure wisdom and deep spiritual enlightenment, and find yourself (like me) a more enriched human being for having delved into the great mind that is... Hollisterchic102. Enjoy!

Punky Bruiser

2006-12-21T12:27:00.000+10:00

Check out the whopper bruise I copped from a fall in the bathroom three days ago! Note to self: don't ever get out of the shower again, without first making sure all the soap has been washed off!!

Strange noises coming from the kitchen made me drop everything and make a mad dash from the shower. Unfortunately soap, water & tiles make for a very nasty fall. Luckily, I didn't hit my head, but my butt and arm are still pretty peeved at the way I've treated them.

Ouchies!!!! It still hurts. :(

Meanwhile, the bruise has taken on a life of its own. I'm wondering if I should keep it and market it as a tourist attraction. Other possibilities for Bruiser include: new logo for next years Gay & Lesbian Mardi Gras (it has every colour in the rainbow) or an art exhibition depicting bruises from every race/sex/religion... sort of like a cultural celebration of bruises - bringing people together as one.

5 Things You Didn't Know About Me

2006-12-17T11:58:00.001+10:00

Apparently I've been 'tagged' by Masey. So here are my 5 Things You Didn't Know About Me. (Please Note: it does not say 5 Interesting Things You Didn't Know About Me)...

1.) (Stolen straight from Masey) I don't drink tea or coffee. Must be a genetic thing. Hot dirty water does not tickle my fancy. Especially at 3-4 bucks a pop!!! Are you people mad???

2.) I'm a bit of a Germophobe. Especially at work. I'll often cringe when I have to take money from kids, cause they all have 'wee hands'. Yurk! Workmates have learnt to accept my borderline OCD behaviour, but that doesn't stop them from making fun of me.

3.) After the stroke of midnight on New Years, the first thing I say is "White Rabbit". Every year. Without fail. Not sure where this one came from, but I have vague recollections of Dad saying it, and it just stuck.

4.) I need the fan on to sleep at night. The gentle hum of the fan soothes me off to La La Land, while blocking out all the scary 'night noises', like Luna having a bath at 3am! My fan dependency has never been clearer than last week when I broke my fan at midnight!! I was working the next day too, so had to spend TWO nights sans fan. Terrible sleeping conditions!... and I became grumpy & irritable! And yes, I do still have the fan on in Winter... I just point it away from me, and grab an extra blanky.

5.) I still have my Cabbage Patch Doll from when I was a young'un. Her name is Vern Esmeralda. It was such an unfortunate name, and even though I had the option of legally changing her name with the Cabbage Patch who would send out a revised Adoption Certificate, I was concerned that Vern would be forever scarred by my nonacceptance of who she was. I didn't want her going through life with an identity crisis. I think that speaks volumes for the kind of child I was. And that is all I am going to say.

Crackerjack Xmas Party

2006-12-15T09:51:00.000+10:00

The work Xmas Party is done & dusted for another year. I've been with this mob for three years now <insert 'doesn't time fly when you're having fun' sayings here>, and it became pretty obvious back in October that if nobody took charge of the Xmas Party Arrangements, we'd be doing the same ol' thing as last year, and the year before that etc.. So, of course, in true Meg style, I did indeed take charge. Well, SOMEBODY had too!!!

Somebody mentioned ten pin bowling weeks & weeks ago, but it didn't seem to grab most people. We have an invite list of about 40 once you add in all the partners and ring-ins, and ages vary from 13 to 83 (with a greater number coming from the latter end of the scale). So I thought hey... why not Barefoot Bowls??

And why not indeed. After putting a call in to my good mate John (I think that was his name!?!?) at Carina Bowls Club, we had ourselves a cheap venue complete with bowling coach, BBQ facilities and most importantly a fully stocked bar.

Krystal & I put on a fabulous spread for dinner, even if we do say so ourselves, and then it was off to bowl like demons!

I never knew how long an actual bowling green really is!! Pop's portable bowling green mat we used to play on up on the deck at Peregian was definitely a little more user friendly. I had visions of having to bowl my balls in three stages, but luckily it was easier to get the black ball to the white ball than I first anticipated.

After a couple of practice shots, we were up. And I gotta tell you, I wasn't half bad. I claimed the winning shot on a couple of occasions, and became a valuable team member - well that's MY story anyway & I'm sticking to it.

From all accounts, everyone had a great time, and loved doing something a little bit different this year. I think there was even whispers of "the best Xmas Party ever" from some. A group of ladies from the club who had obviously been watching Krystal & I prep for dinner asked if we would join their club. We'll get back to you ladies, in a few years perhaps. My only gripe was that the bar did not have genuine 1927 prices like in the Mick Molloy movie Crackerjack. That was a bit of a bummer.

I now have a deeper appreciation of the skill involved in lawn bowls that's for sure. I even caught part of a tournament on ABC yesterday, and found it quite compelling viewing. Go figure!

Got 3 Minutes To Spare?

2006-12-04T18:56:00.000+10:00

Then check this out...

Classic!!!

Welcome Into The World..

2006-11-15T18:27:00.000+10:00

.. Baby Caitlyn!

Born at 2.59am today, and weighing in at 6lb 12oz - almost a month early- Caitlyn Elizabeth Lynch is an absolute treasure! A sister to my favourite little guy Benny, baby Caitlyn has broken tradition in the Lynch Family line by being the first girl born for many a generation. So she's special from day 1!

For me, I can't wait to play 'dress-ups' with her, and do girly girl things that girls do. (Might have to do a google search in preparation!)

So welcome into this fabulous, crazy, mixed up world Baby Caitlyn. It is surely a much brighter world now you're in it!

Country Chick Britt

2006-11-10T21:40:00.000+10:00

I went out and bought a CD this week based on a 5 second grab I heard on the ARIAS last Sunday. I've done that a couple of times. I can tell if I like an artist from just a short grab, or maybe just one song on Rage or something. I am an EXCELLENT judge of character, even if I do say so myself.

Anyway, the artist is a country singer Catherine Britt. I don't mind a bit of country, especially the chick singers. Everyone knows I love Kasey Chambers, and Carolyn Dawn Johnson is another fav. For some reason the vocal on country music is always so pure, and the lyrics get to the point quicker. I like that.

So Catherine Britt is really good ok, and I'm glad I listened to my intuition once again. Standout tracks: 'The Upside of Being Down', 'Hot Doggin' & 'Swingin' Door'.

* Interesting Fact: the album was produced by Bill Chambers, Kasey's Pa.

* Interesting Observation: the album artwork looks suspiciously similar to Jewel's fantastic "Goodbye Alice in Wonderland". A quick check of dates puts Catherine Britt's CD first out. Hmmmm, interesting...

Gone Fishing

2006-11-06T16:36:00.000+10:00

I've always wanted a fish, but was put off by the notion that I'd have to invest in proper tanks/filters/lights blah blah blah... but over at the Mases place the other night, I was introduced to a swanky little guy named Simon. He's a siamese fighting fish, and requires little upkeep to keep him alive. Perfect! Wrap one up. But still one problem remained... my black panther, Luna!! I had nowhere high enough to keep her dirty little paws out of a fishbowl, yet low enough to be able to watch Mr Fish swim around merrily. Then, my new fridge arrived on Saturday...

After unpacking new fridge, I decided it needed something decorative on top... and then the lightbulb went off like a lightbulb...

So today I brought home a fish who now needs a name. Any suggestions?? He's blue. And he's feisty! You should see his table manners... appalling! Rips apart his flakes like a lion ripping apart buffalo. And the way he flaps his little blue side fins is so darn cute. That's about as far as I've gotten in getting to know him. So armed with these crucial details, I'm open to naming ideas...

Rainy Days & Mondays

2006-11-04T13:51:00.000+10:00

I love Rainy Days & Mondays!!

I think my love of rainy days harks back to my school days, when three or more drops of rain at 7.45am meant scoring a lift to school, instead of jumping on the pushy for the long hard slog of a ride to Shalom CC. I still love a good rainy day, although they're few & far between at the present time. No sir, you'll never hear me complain about a rainy day... or even an ongoing succession of rainy days for that matter. I love the moodiness of a bleak rainy day, and today is such a moody day. So today I find myself sitting contentedly on a cloud. A rain cloud to be sure.

And Mondays?? Well Mondays are my Sundays. Sundays are my Fridays. And Saturdays are my slightly displaced Saturdays. But since my Sundays are a weaker version of a Friday, I still consider Fridays to be Fridays. Which means that Saturdays & Mondays are my weekend with a bit of a hiccup in the form of half a Sunday. So in summary, I love Mondays... and rainy days... which is a bold refutation of Karen Carpenter's proposition that "...rainy days & Mondays always get me down"...

My Beef With Eskimo Joe

2006-10-31T21:02:00.000+10:00

Grrrr.....

I'm really liking Eskimo Joe at the moment. But there is one song that just shits me from the start, to the point where I can't enjoy the song. And I WOULD enjoy the song, if it weren't for the start.

It goes a little something like this...

Sarah! Wont you tell me your name?

WHY ARE YOU ASKING HER NAME, WHEN YOU'VE JUST SAID IT????? It's like me saying: Brisbane. What is the capital city of Queensland? Like a game of freaking Jeopardy!!

I've burdened many a friend with this dilemma, and while most just shake their head as if I'M the nutbar (!!!), I have had one person offer a possible reasoning for this stupid lyric... perhaps Sarah is a stripper/hooker, and "Sarah" is her stage name, and the song is about a guy who's fallen for her, and wants to know the REAL girl behind the "Sarah" persona. Ok, so it's just occurred to me that I should look up the full lyrics of the song, and see if that's what it is. (I've refused thus far to listen to the song purely based on the fact that the opening line is infuriating.)

So here are the lyrics (and the song):

Sarah
Won't you tell me your name?
I've been waiting here for hours
In the gauding by the flowers
You're so shy
So just open your eyes
The boys all form a line
To be written out in time
A long,long,long, long time ago______

Emergency
I think I'm falling apart
Emergency
I think I am losing the fight
And I don't know if I can do it
I don't know if I can try
I don't know if anyone asked me the reason I lied
She sighed

Sarah
Is she your new best friend?
One day it will end, you know it will
You're so shy
So just let it fall apart
Let it stumble in the dark
With the razors in your heart
A long, long, long, long time ago

Emergency
I think I'm falling apart
Emergency
I think I am losing the fight
And I don't know if I can do it
I don't know if I can try
I don't know if anyone asked me the reason I lied
She sighed

Emergency
I think I'm falling apart
Emergency
I think I am losing the fight
And I don't know if I can do it
I don't know if I can try
I don't know if anyone asked me the reason I lied
She sighed

Any thoughts??? Doesn't seem to be about a stripper/ hooker to me. Then again I can't work out WHAT it's about. Does anybody know?? This is really bugging me. Possibly even worse than the great Bic Runga "From here to there to everywhere, and back to London Square" mystery of early 2006. Help!

Due To Popular Demand...

2006-10-08T22:20:00.000+10:00

...here is a new blog entry. By "popular demand" I actually mean that I have been threatened with a stick up the bot bot from a family member, and in the interests of keeping the fam out of the daily newspapers, here I am.

Ummmm, I actually have nothing to say. Indeed I have MANY things I could talk about, but I still have this recurring fear that my ramblings are of little to no consequence to anybody else but thyself. Call it Bloggers Block if you will. But I am here to blog, and blog I shall...

Thought #1: Why hasn't Steve Poltz released his new album yet??? Is he intentionally trying to bug me? Or is there some sort of "industry" holdup? Either way, I'm not happy. I need new Steve. I'm about to burst in anticipation.

Thought #2: Is it just me, or are the years getting shorter? It's October already, but I feel like I'm just entering April. The silly season is just about here, and I am soooo not ready for such silliness. Considering a complete boycott of the whole shebang. Don't scoff, I've done it before.

Thought #3: Save my Damien on Australian Idol!!!! Text "Damien" to 191010 before tomorrow night's show. I'm not one to beg, but pleeeeaaaaasssseee help to keep him in for another week. I love you Damien!!!!

Thought #4: When are we going to hear Paris Hilton & Stephanie McIntosh sing live???

Thought #5: Why is it that every man I become interested in turns out to be either gay or married/betrothed??? It's such a cliche, but I am a walking cliche. I don't wanna be a cliche anymore.

Thought #6: My cat has found a friend. It's a fluffy grey cat, and they just hang out in the garden. No hissing. No fussing. They just hang out. It's so lovely to watch.

Thought #7: How can anyone poach a tiger? Even if you were incredibly poor and in desparate need of a feed, how could you be in the presence of such a majestic and wonderful creature, and still choose to take it's life?? I'd rather die.

Thought #8: My cat is malting so fast at the moment, that if I clean out the vacuum I could construct a whole new cat out of the fur she has shed in the past couple of weeks. Bloody cat!

Thought #9: I have a friend who's an artist, who wants to paint my portrait. Flattering? Kinda. What's scary is that she paints as good as a photograph, and I HATE photographs! I've never been painted before. I'm a bit antsy about it.

Thought #10: I'm in Spring Cleaning mode at the moment. Kitchen - done. Bathroom - done. Bedroom - needs a bit of a cupboard cleanout. Lounge Room - needs some serious work. Study/Junk Room - needs for the door to be kept firmly shut!

I'm assuming my ass is now safe from the stick!?!?

Freaky People

2006-09-04T19:24:00.000+10:00

Do I have a sign on my forehead that says "Friend of Freaky People"??

Taking the train home form work today, I had my ritualistic nap between Coorparoo & Lindum stations only to open my tired little peeps and catch a freaky Freak Person taking my picture on his mobile phone!!!!! WHAT THE????

This I could forgive if I were Jennifer Hawkins or even someone unknown of astounding beauty & allure. But an astounding beauty I am not. And allure is not a word I've ever heard used to describe me. I could even understand if the freak was capturing my buxom bosom for prosperity, but my work polo shirt offers absolutely no glimpse of anything remotely cleavage orientated. Buggers me WHY he found it so necessary to take my photograph... I don't think I even want to know. Freak!

After catching him in the act, he turned ever so casually towards the door of the train and looked back at me in the window. I hope the image of my special scowl face is forever burned into his retinas... freak!!

My question is this... what do you do in this situation?? Do you confront the freak and demand he erases the images in front of you? And what if he tells you to sod off? Do you have a civil right to grab the phone and smash it to smitherines? Do you ask for his licence and registration and take that to the police?

I have made it my Mission Of The Week to find out from either or both of my two policey friends what is the appropriate course of action, and I'll get back to you. In the meantime, I am relying on my good friend Karma to defend my honour and seek retribution on my behalf. Freak!

Sad Day For Australia

2006-09-04T16:24:00.000+10:00

It was with great sadness today that I learnt of the shocking news that one of my heroes Steve Irwin had been killed in an accident off the coast of Cairns.

Love him or hate him as a TV personality, there is no denying that Steve Irwin has done wonderful, marvellous, out-of-this-world things for wildlife education and conservation, not only in Australia but throughout the world. He has opened so many people's eyes to the wonders of our natural wildlife and in doing so has fostered a community spirit focused on preserving our precious ecosystem.

I aim to be one of those people who carries on his legacy and continues the great work he has begun. I only wish I had had the opportunity to meet him and let him know how much he inspired me personally while he was still alive.

Steve Irwin was a great great man.

It is a sad day indeed.

Roger's Groove

2006-08-23T17:57:00.000+10:00

I bought an ipod shuffle yesterday!!! YAY ME! I'm now one of the cool people on the train who have white earplugs instead of black.

I got sick of my discman taking up precious handbag space, and having to spend precious sleeping time in the morning working out which disc I was going to take to work with me. Add to that the cost of batteries and blank cd's to create new mixes which I just get sick of in two days..and this little baby is gonna pay for itself in a month!!

When I installed the software and all that crap, I had to give it a name..and so it is now known as "Roger's Groove". I gave Roger's Groove his very first outing today, and he did well. His earplugs are sooooo far superior to the ones I've been using, and every song he chose for me was a winner. I even bought Roger's Groove a groovey black leather jacket, and now he is the envy of all the other nude shuffles on the train... they want him baby.

The way Roger's Groove plays me tunes without skipping & jumping all over the place just makes me wonder why I didn't adopt him sooner!?!?! I just know we're going to be great pals... until the mighty Apple Corporation seduces me into forking out 500 bucks for the whole kit & caboodle... I don't need TWO kidney's, do I??

Possible RTA Addiction

2006-08-09T18:00:00.000+10:00

Drum roll please...

Today, I constructed my very first 'Ready To Assemble' masterpiece. And I am proud as punch!!

I decided my beloved Cd's & Dvd's needed better digs than the printer box they've called home for the past 3 years. After carting home the flat pack of suspiciously cheap looking timber, I sat down with my tools of the trade: scissors, screwdrivers (TWO types!!...not that I needed both, but it made me feel more Jamie Durie), bourbon & instruction sheet. I was ready to begin.

And it just wasn't that difficult. I got it built with minimal swearing and stomping of feet, and was suitably chuffed with the end result. I cannot convey the sense of satisfaction I felt at placing my Cd's into this marvel of modern architecture...

So who made it into the upper half of the stand?? Jewel, Bic, Tori, Pete, Carolyn, Kasey & James are all up there winking at me, while Steve takes top spot simply because... well because he's Steve!

And now I find myself daydreaming about future R.T.A. construction projects that I can embark on, armed with my trusty toolbox and a stubbie of Wild Turkey...

Scientific Discovery

2006-07-22T14:12:00.000+10:00

I think I've inadvertently discovered a new syndrome... I shall call it "Retro Pop Syndrome". It's been happening for a while now... and I've tried to ignore it, but The Spice Girls is the last straw... I need to acknowledge my condition.

Retro Pop Syndrome is where you find yourself actively seeking out pop music of days gone by, even when you never liked it in it's heyday. For example: The Spice Girls. Not the greatest musical talent the world has ever seen, I'll admit. But today I found myself bopping along to "Stop", a catchy little number if ever there was one. And so I find myself searching their discography for other tunes I might like to bop along to. And I have found a few, I must admit. Perhaps I should purchase a "Best Of.." album by the Spicies. (?)

And so I ask myself "What is the catalyst for Retro Pop Syndrome?", and all I can come up with is this... taking the Spice Girls example I think back to circa 1990 when the 'Girls' were at their peak... I shuffled around in a very different crowd. The "cool" (ish) crowd. A crowd far too obsessed with nonchalance to pay any attention to pop culture. It just wasn't cool to listen to The Spice Girls. BUT, cut to a decade and a half later, and The Spice Girls can be classified as RETRO...and retro is the height of cool... isn't it?

And so I find myself a sufferer of Retro Pop Syndrome. I wonder if there is any government funded pension I can apply for??? Perhaps RPS is the root of my 80's music obsession. Perhaps RPS is to blame for my Cathy Dennis & Debbie Gibson interests (both VERY talented gals I'll have you know!!). Perhaps I can now listen to all the Retro Pop my little heart desires now that I have a diagnosis to exonerate me. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have Deep Forest all cued up for my meditation time.

Insert Smiley Face Here

2006-07-15T13:38:00.000+10:00

Things are good. Stuff is good. Life in general is good.

It's raining here in sunny Qld.. that always gets me happy. I got to sleep in..that also makes me happy. My cat hasn't attacked my feet in over 24 hours... happy. A week ahead in uni work... happy. Not sick... happy. Not dying... happy. No one I love is dying... happy. Day off work today... happy. Steve Poltz is on the verge of releasing a new CD for MY listening pleasure... HAPPY!

I have nothing to grumble about. Just savouring the moment.

Better Homes & Gardens

2006-06-10T13:14:00.000+10:00

I just signed a new 12 month lease on my humble little abode. To put this into perspective: I am known as the gypsy of the family. I have moved 13 times in 10 years. A 12 month lease is a BIG DEAL for me!

Knowing that I'm here for another year (at least) my thoughts are now turning all Tonia Toddmanish on me. I can't help but envisage a home worthy of inclusion in Home Beautiful, even though I still live like a student. (ie bare minimums) Ok, so I AM a student, but I'm an almost 30 student, and almost 30 students shouldn't be living like students anymore. Go with me on this...

So what have I done so far to make this Beautiful Home a reality?? I've made a list, that's what! Lists are my thing. Before I do anything I make a list. It helps me to focus my scattered brain... for at least a few minutes.

I've also bought a shower caddy!! Cost me a whole $1 at The Warehouse, but its the small changes that matter right?

Oh, and I've also bought a hanging basket for outside to block my pesky neighbours view from the stairs. They're odd, and I don't want them to see me, and vice versa. Now all I need is a plant to go in said hanging basket, and I will be well on my way to becoming the next Martha Stewart.

My Day As A Blonde

2006-06-05T16:26:00.000+10:00

I woke up yesterday, nothing unusual about that. From there my day just went from weird to weirder. It all started as I was brushing my teeth... rather casually as I wasn't in any hurry. After all, I had another hour to be ready for work. Or did I?...

Actually no. I was meant to be at the train station waiting for Mr Train Man to take me to work. CRAP! Get ready in 5 minutes flat!? (Girls..I know you know what I mean when I say this is just not on). Rush out the door...CRAP! Forgot to put contacts in...race back inside, put eyes in..only to have one of them decide today would be a good day to have a hissy fit at me. Take out contact..rinse..put back in..race out door. Cat gives a puzzled look. Don't have time to explain to cat. CRAP! Don't have any credit on phone to call work on my way..go back inside...ring work. Race out door again.

In a complete daze for whole trip to work. How did I lose an hour? Get to work. Explain to Krystal I am another planet... apologies all round. All is forgiven, after all Krystal is a TRUE blonde in every sense of the word. And I love her for it! She understands.

We get busy. I wince to Krystal that I am in no fit state to deal with this. She laughs. Not funny Krystal! I have a customer with a ticket from Darwin asking if he can check it here... "sure" I tell him. Have a look at ticket...it's different looking. (?)Geez, Darwin must have different lotto tickets to the rest of Queensland. That's unusual. Query Krystal: "Darwin is in Queensland isn't it?" (in front of customer mind you). The tables turn and for once Krystal is shaking her head at me. A few looong seconds go by, and I realise I am thinking of Cairns at the tip of our fair state. Hmmm... something's just not right today.

Afternoon progresses with Meg getting more & more useless with every passing hour. Krystal asks if I am in love and/or pregnant. Negative on both counts. Boss comes in. Try to explain my strange behaviour. But no-one can offer an explanation. Boss laughs at me. At least he's not mad.

Take frozen lasagne out of work freezer to take back home for dinner... I decide it best not to cook tonight - just too dangerous. My only decision is whether to nuke it or bung it in the oven. Nuking seems the easiest option... just throw it in the microwave. It is decided. At last minute have a change of heart. Leftovers taste so much better warmed up in the oven. Throw lasagne in the oven.

Mmmmm lasagne smells good. Tummy growling at the scent. Go to oven. Discover lasagne covered in a lovely layer of melted plastic. CRAP! That's right... oven not like microwave... meant to transfer to an ovenproof dish. CRAP! Deal with melted plastic later.

Ring Thai restaurant and beg them to cook me some fried rice to come and pick up. Turn off every electrical appliance in the house. I am not safe. Text latest ordeal to Krystal. She replies with a phone call. Seems when she asked me to complete one of her jobs while she went to do one of mine... I forgot to actually complete it. Boss tells Krystal she's having a blonde day too. Krystal didn't have the heart to explain it was still me... just took the wrap on my behalf. I do love her so! I'd love her MORE if she would stop laughing at me.

Crawl into a ball and watch 'Rain Man' until 1am...feeling good that Raymond is not laughing at me too. And thus concludes my day as a blonde.

Steve Poltz Dreams

2006-06-04T16:48:00.000+10:00

I have had many dreams about Steve Poltz. Here are just a couple of the more memorable:

I remember being a waitress... and I was listening to a Steve Poltz CD at work. My boss told me I had to go deliver something to an address downtown. I was peeved cause I was enjoying listening to Steve. I got to the destination... and who do you think was playing on the stage???? Yup... my boy Steve! I decide it is destiny that we should meet... so I quickly run my errands with the intention of coming back to stalk Steve. Of course, when i get back, he is already gone.

I am at some school. Steve Poltz is playing on the stage, and I vow that THIS time I will meet him. I run around like a crazy cat on crack trying to find a toilet as I need to pee. Do you think this school has easily found loos? Nope! When I get back to the stage area I see Steve being ushered out the gate by his gang of merry men. I run after him. I can still see him... but need to run faster to catch him. And here's the weird bit... I turn around and run backwards cause I go faster that way! In any of my dreams where I need to run... I ALWAYS run backwards!! But I miss Steve again. Heartbroken.

Steve is actually a guest at my place. My sister lives with me. That's just odd in itself. I let Steve onto my computer to do his emails and all that... and he has heaps of photos. I say to him "hey, I'd love to see them sometime"... he says "well why not now?" Can you feel the passion people?????

Don't know who Steve Poltz is?? Here's a sample...

Grant McLennan Dies Aged 48

2006-05-08T14:33:00.000+10:00

I remember sitting at Ric's enjoying a cool refreshing ale with my friend Garry one day, when Grant McLennan sat down right next to us. Being the most MASSIVE Go-Betweens fan I've ever come across, Garry was almost wetting himself. It's so funny seeing a grown man be completely dumbfounded when their idol is in the near vacinity!

I only saw The Go-Betweens once at The Zoo... it was their first comeback gig about 5 years ago. They rocked. Garry, on the other hand, was a sight for sore eyes... he had ruptured his achilles that very day at soccer. Doctors orders were for immediate bedrest..followed by 2 months as a virtual cripple. Do you think that was going to stop the man from seeing Go-Betweens?? Nope. Luckily The Zoo has easy access... except for those 3 flights of narrow & horridly steep stairs that is!! It was an interesting night.

Grant McLennan died in his sleep Saturday night.

Jewel Gets It Right this Time

2006-05-06T22:28:00.000+10:00

*phew*

After the atrocious effort of '0304', Jewel has come up with a record that's a bit of a mix really... but does not disappoint this hardcore Jewel fan. Most of you could not care less, but for anyone who does, I hereby give you Meg's Review of Jewel's 'Goodbye Alice in Wonderland'...

1.) Again & Again: the first single, you may have heard on radio. It's a nice pop track, very Jewel-ish, and the film clip is beautiful. It's criminal that anyone should be that beautiful!
2.) Long Slow Slide: this was included as a live track bonus for Aussie's on 'This Way', and numerous live bootlegs circulate. But this recording does the song justice. Love a good reworking... which has been done many times on this album!
3.) Goodbye Alice in Wonderland: obviously this is Jewel's therapy couch song. It is pleasant & sweet.
4.) Good Day: an upbeat track. Yell it out the window when you suddenly realise life is too short to spend worrying about useless crap!
5.) Satellite: this one's an oldy! Has been floating around as a favourite to perform live for eons. Maaaybe a little over-produced for my tastes, but still non-offensive. Can see this released as a single.
6.) Only One Too: word on the street is that this track has been mixed by a couple of different DJ's, so obviously Jewel still feels the need to dabble in dance music. Will she ever learn?? But still, it's a funky song that does not turn me off my dinner.
7.) Words Get In The Way: any song that begins with "Come. Here. Butt..er..cup. Let. Me. Feel. You. Up." gets my vote! Loving this song! Picture me bopping along a la Bridget Jones...
8.) Drive To You: Bravo!! Another new Jewel song thats very Jewel. Phew, we were scared there for a minute!
9.) Last Dance Rodeo here's another oldie that any Jewel Fan worth spitting at will have downloaded illegally. This song has sat idle in my "Live Tracks" folder for years, as it's dead boring...but this re-working gives it a good kick up the arse! Worth listening to now. Gotta love that.
10.) Fragile Heart - well here it is... the song that would not die! When I first heard she was reworking this song YET AGAIN I threw my head against the cold hard wall repeatedly! There are versions of this song from 0304, from an acoustic radio show, and numerous other public appearances floating around the traps. But bloody hell, she's finally given it life! A remarkable feat... and surely the measure of the record as a whole! My hat goes off to Jewel here, I did not keep the faith. I feel so dirty. Someone pass me the soap and scrubbing brush...
11.) Stephenville, TX: an old favourite! Again with apprehension I listened to this for the first time today. She's given it beats, and it works well. My only gripe: she wrote this when she was 25. The words have always been "I'm 25 years old, that aint the end, sure aint where I began..", so why has she changed it to being 31 years old?? It just feels like she's missed the essence of the song here with that one little change. Just my own silly opinion I guess.
12.) Where You Are: one of the nicest suprises of the whole record. It's pretty. It's raw. It's catchy. It's damn good. Evokes memories of Joni Mitchell's 'A Case of You'.
13.) 1000 Miles Away: this song has been around since she began her career, so I'm sure she put a lot of time into getting this right... and she has. It's just such a pretty song. She really didn't need to do a lot to it to get it right. Finishes the CD nicely... and Jewel fans around the world sigh deeply, and loudly with relief!!

Videos:

Goodbye Alice in Wonderland...

Again & Again...

Good Day...

Stephenville, Tx...

Family News

2006-05-06T18:02:00.000+10:00

So I wake up this morning to a text from my darling sister: "Are you home?"

Of course this sends me into a panic. It's too short, too blunt. I just know she has something to tell me that cant be said in a text!

<insert mild panic attacks here>

So I call her...
I'm going to be an AUNTY again!!!!

And Benny is going to have a little brother or sister.

King Cheetah Naming Competition

2006-04-14T16:02:00.000+10:00

I've entered a competition to name the King Cheetah that the National Zoo & Aquarium in Canberra has acquired. The King Cheetah is sooooo rare. Estimations of their numbers range from 15 to 30 left in THE WORLD! Out of those it is estimated that there are only THREE left in the wild. Figures like that are the reason I'm studying for a career in conservation. Figures like that break my heart.

The King Cheetah has a recessive gene which affects his markings. Instead of the regular cheetah "spots", King Cheetah has "splotches"... which run into each other to form stripes almost. Anyway, the zoo has a competition running to name their King Cheetah, and the winner gets a trip to Canberra to meet him.

My entries are:
"Amare" - meaning "he's good looking" in Ethiopia
"Chaka" (or "Shaka") - South African for "great King"
"Kito" - Swahili for "precious", and my favourite...
"Azizi" - which means "a treasure, precious one" in Swahili Cross your fingers (or hold your thumbs) for me!!!!

Ranger Megan - Wombats

2006-04-10T17:44:00.000+10:00

The "common wombat" is the better known wombie (as I like to call them), as they are much cuter. But, it is the "Southern Hairy-Nosed Wombat" that is the more endangered of the species...

The Southern Hairy-Nosed Wombat has softer fur, and like all wombats, builds complex burrowing systems... which can house between 5 and 10 wombats. They have this hard shell-like plate on their arses which enables them to push their butts up against the opening of their burrow, to stop intruders from getting in. You could crack a whip against their butt and not do any damage, it's that hard.

Also, wombats have this reputation for being slow & steady... a bit of a dawdler... when in fact, they can get up to speeds of 40km/hour if they need to. Keep in mind this is only over short distances, but still, quite astonishing for a species that has a reputation for being slow.

Perhaps the best known wombat in Australia is Wandin Valley's Fatso, beloved pet of Frank & Shirley Gilroy from A Country Practice. I don't think I was alone in wanting my very own pet Wombat as a kid.

Ranger Megan - Chinese White Dolphins

2006-04-03T18:45:00.000+10:00

The Chinese White Dolphin, or "Pink Dolphin" as it is commonly known, is unfortunately on the verge of extinction! Estimates of their numbers range from 100 to 150...a horrid number either way. Small numbers of them can be found from South Africa to Australia and up the Chinese coast, however pollution, boat traffic and over-fishing threaten their very survival.

Because they are such a rare species, not much is really known about them, and so it is not fully understood WHY this dolphin is pink in colour, although there is a theory that they are not born pink but rather turn this colour with age. Pink Dolphins born in Southeast Asia are actually born BLACK, then they quickly turn to grey and eventually to white with pink pigment coming through in adulthood. Pink Dolphins can live as long as 35 years, and grow to between 6 and 8 foot.

Bad Toyota BAD!

2006-04-01T11:14:00.000+10:00

You know how Steve Irwin has done a few TV ads for Toyota... well I just saw a new one recently. This one doesn't have Steve Irwin in it, but instead a rugged Aussie bloke having a showdown with a croc, and in the end the bloke steps out of his Toyota Jeep wearing crocodile boots.

How can a company that has a strong affilliation with a croc conservationist come out with an ad like that?? Idiots!

Ranger Megan - Red Panda

2006-03-26T19:39:00.000+10:00

The RED PANDA can be found in areas of China, India and Nepal... as well as zoos worldwide. They were upgraded from 'vulnerable' to 'endangered' in 1996, not a very good promotion at all! The main threats for them are poaching of course... for their fur, and loss of habitat due to deforestation. Even in areas where SOME forest has been left standing, there is already damage done because their communities have been segregated.

For some reason the vibrant colour of the fur has kept it from being HIGHLY sought after. But bizarrely, Chinese newlyweds sometimes wear a hat made of red panda fur (complete with ornamental tail!) as a good luck charm for a long and healthy marriage. Someone really should tell them about rings, and garters and such things.

Red Pandas are good tree climbers, which allows them to fill up on bamboo leaves (their fav food) while also keeping out of range of predators.

The Red Panda is actually a member of the Raccoon family. It got it's 'panda' name because of a couple of similarities to the Giant Panda... things like the shape of the skull, tooth structure, and a false thumb which is important for holding bamboo at dinner time. The false thumb is actually just a bit of modified wrist bone... evolution at it's finest. The Raccoon, however, does not have a false thumb... hence poor Mr Red Panda has an identity crisis... Who Am I? Am I a Panda? Am I a Raccoon?? Eeeks!!!

Ranger Megan - The Pallas Cat

2006-03-25T17:44:00.000+10:00

The Pallas Cat can be found in arid areas of China & Mongolia. They have a stocky, compact body, with thick THICK fur for survival in friggin cold areas. Their ears are lowset and their coats a mottled grey colour so as not to attract attention to themsleves as they creep silently over rocky terrain in search of a meal, which can be anything from small birds, rodents, or the rabbit-like Pika.

Until recently, Pallas cats have not been able to be bred in captivity... but a bunch of geeky biologists figured out that it was all a matter of mood-lighting, and now they can be seen in a few select zoos around the world. Pallas Cats are known for their "hissing fits"... they hiss even as kittens (even before they've opened their eyes!)... this is all part of their feisty robust nature, and who the hell can argue with that?

Steve Poltz: the new Gilligan

2006-03-25T15:55:00.000+10:00

New Press Release from Poltz.com:

President George W. Bush shocked members of Congress today when he named Steve Poltz to be the new Gilligan. The announcement was made at 12 noon est. on the steps of The White House. "Bob Denver was a fine American and a great songwriter," said The President. "I really like riding my bike while listening to Rocky Mountain High on my Ipod." When The President was told he may be mistakenly referring to John Denver, the singer, he replied "don't tell me what I already know. I just like talking about John Denver." When another reporter mentioned that the song Rocky Mountain High was possibly about marijuana use the President angrily snapped, "Condi! Why wasn't I apprised of this situation? Where is Dick Cheney? I am tired of answering these questions." Just then White House Press Secretary Scott McLellen whispered in The President's ear and The President said, "What? Gilligan died? That is awful! Did he ever get off of that Island? Poor little feller. I liked him. I think I will make an executive decision and name Steve Poltz as the new Gilligan. I don't really like his music but he sure is goofy and dorky and I can see him either being Shaggy from Scooby Doo or Gilligan. Looks like it is going to be Gilligan!" Calls to Steve Poltz were not returned. His agent released this statement: "Steve looks forward to working with The President as Gilligan but still wants to write songs."

Meeting Maria

2006-03-07T22:23:00.000+10:00

So there I was...serving someone in a crappy mood, when I look up to find a familiar face walking in. I think to myself "hey Maria's here". Then I think to myself "MARIA'S HERE????" It honestly took that long to remember that we've never met before. It just didn't seem possible! It still doesn't. I am now more convinced than ever that we knew each other in a former life. After a big hug that seemed to have no end, we just picked up where we left off the last time we spoke. The girl I was working with asked me later who she was... and I said "that's Maria! You know MARIA!" Then I told her that was the first time we'd met. Her reaction..."GET OUT!" Very bizarre, but so very very special!

Complaint Letters

2006-02-25T17:22:00.000+10:00

Has anyone ever sent a letter of complaint to a company for the sole purpose of giving the customer service department a giggle?? Ok, I know it sounds really stupid but I have. I was bored one day and sent a letter to Domino's Pizza in reference to their "in-between pizza bases" that they were advertising a few years ago. The ad showed a pan base and a thin base kissing up to each other and eventually merging... hence the "in-between" base. My letter was basically an outrage at the level of pizza pornography in today's society. It was hell funny, and a copy of the letter lived on the fridge for ages. Wish I still had a copy, but I don't. Anyways, with that little background story, you can imagine how much the following email exchange cracked me up. Stumbled upon it just now. (NOTE: 'Walls' is what Streets Ice Cream is in Australia.)...

-----Original Message-----
From: Mr Madeupname [mailto:madeup@email.com]
Sent: 22 July 2004 16:09
To: Walls Customer Service
Subject: Re: letters of complaint

As an avid collector, I was particularly pleased to see the limited edition Walls Magnum ice creams.

I collected them religiously, and, as I was so proud of my collection, I displayed them in the glass cabinet at the foot of my stairs.

Everything was fine at first, the lollies looked great beneath the low voltage halogen lighting that I bought at Ikea.

Then to my horror, the ice creams melted. The resulting mess dripped onto the lower shelf, destroying the wrapper of my limited edition orange flavour Kit-Kat (out of production and irreplaceable) and has left an unfortunate looking stain on my Lynyrd Skynrd plectrum (used by Allen Collins in the 1982 Retribution Tour).

Worse still, it has completely covered a Diet Pepsi can, used by Lynda Nolan at Ingol Golf and Squash club in 1992 after a pro-celebrity golf tournament.

This loss is particularly distressing as I have been in protracted talks with the Roslin Institute (the Scottish research centre which created Dolly the Sheep) with a view to extracting the DNA and cloning Lynda so future generations can enjoy her as much as I have.

I look forward to hearing how you propose to rectify this whole sorry mess.

____________________________________
-----Original Message-----
From: Walls Customer Service
Sent: 24 July 2004 14:25
To: Mr Madeupname [mailto:madeup@email.com]
Subject: Re: letters of complaint

Dear Mr Madeupname

Thank you for your recent contact to Unilever.com.

I was sorry to hear about your recent experience with Magnum Seven Deadly Sins. All of our ice cream products should be stored at -18 at all times apart from when you are consuming.

In the circumstances, whilst I am concerned to learn of your experience, we cannot accept liability in this instance.

But on a good note I have heard that they are producing Orange Kit Kat Cubes and we are currently producing Cornetto Love Potions but please do store in the freezer as may cause more damage.

Kind regards

Kelly Burrows
Consumer Link Advisor

____________________________________
-----Original Message-----
From: Mr Madeupname [mailto:madeup@email.com]
Sent: 24 July 2004 15:01
To: Walls Customer Service
Subject: Re: letters of complaint
So I replied: Dear Kelly.
Many thanks for replying to me, I'm truly humbled.

Firstly I'd like to apologise for my angry tone, I've calmed down a bit and now feel somewhat philosophical about my loss. I'm sure you understand, it's human nature to lash out in times of stress and I was utterly bereft at the time.

I've since looked into a liquid nitrogen-cooled storage/display facility for future purchases, and as a goodwill gesture, I'm going to allow you to provide me with enough vouchers to collect the full set of Cornetto Love Potions.

I read with great interest about the Orange Kit Kat cubes, and although I'm looking forward to trying them, they're not "limited editions" so are of little interest from a collectors point of view. I'll just have to hope another pristine example pops up on E-Bay, though Christ only knows how much I'll have to pay. I suppose we're all a little older and wiser after my ordeal.

On a lighter note, a friend in the dry-cleaning industry managed to remove the chocolate stain from the plectrum but unfortunately, we didn't manage to recover any of Lynda Nolan's DNA. I'm afraid that you and I will have to shoulder the burden of guilt for many years to come.

Thanks again Kelly, and I look forward to freezing your samples for years to come. Best regards,

Mr Madeupname

____________________________________
-----Original Message-----
From: Mr Madeupname [mailto:madeup@email.com]
Sent: 26 February 2005 09:05
To: Walls Customer Service
Subject: Re: letters of complaint

Dear Kelly

The Cornetto Love Potion's working, I think I've fallen hopelessly in love with you...

"Ice-cream!" I scream in the middle of the night,
I Tiramiss-you with your Spicy Bite,
Your Raspberry Ripples I fondly miss,
So I'll Choc my Nuts with a Pistachio Kiss.

Thanks. xxx

____________________________________

Some 6 months on from this delightful email, the seemingly heartless Kelly had not replied and our love remains unrequited.

JB (you've done it again)

2006-02-06T17:40:00.000+10:00

JB... you've done it again!!!!

Oh, JB, how I love thee... not only do you have the best CD prices in Brisvegas, but you're one of the only to stock my beloved Steve. (Poltz, that is!) Not only THAT..but you stock his DVD... AT THE BARGAIN PRICE OF $10!!!!!! Oh JBee, how I love thee!!!!

If this were not enough, I came to you today for help with my Mum's b'day pressie. Enya, the old girl wants..ENYA! Yes, you have Enya, and lots of her too...all at bargain basement prices! Being an impoverished stoodent, this was music to my ears, and I was able to throw in a bit of El Divo action for the old girl too (which was also on sale at a bargain basement price!)

THEN...you really outdid yourself!!! Casting my eyes over your run-down wooden shelving, with your feral mix of fluorescent sale tags (which look like a techno party gone horribly wrong) I found Bic Runga's new Cd "Birds". I found this a bit odd, as it's Australian release is set for 4th March...but ask questions I shall not, for I love thee JBee!

Yes, I do love you JB Hi-Fi...and I will even forgive thee for the majority of your staff being snooty little twirps with bad hair and very little personality. For I do love thee, JBee.

A Goggle History

2006-01-28T18:07:00.000+10:00

Big news people... I've recently graduated from glasses to contact lenses, and this is SUCH a big deal to me, that I thought I should mark the occasion with a little trip down 'Goggle Memory Lane'...

* My first pair of goggles was when I was about 10! They were the most HORRID pair of salmon coloured kiddies glasses, and Mum just thought they were fab... I did not! Luckily my best friend Shannon had glasses too, which made the ordeal a little more bearable.

Next came a pair of wire frames that, looking back, engulfed my entire friggin face! How my mother could allow me to be seen in such a horrific state is completely beyond me. 'Tis too distressing to think about, so I'll move on...

Next came yet another pair of wire frames that I cannot for the life of me find a photo of. But if history is anything to go by, you can bet your ass they were grosse!

So now we come to my first pair of prescription sunglasses. They were Calvin Klein. Ohh La La! Brace yourself for the only photo I could find of them!!! The cool chicks dancing in the rain is me & Jordy who I lived with @ Paddington (just a two minute walk from the Paddo... 5 if you were blotto) with another girl Bec. I got home from work at about 3pm on the morning of my b'day to find my room flooded with balloons and signs from the girls... GOD i love them, it was such a fab suprise! Anyway, the balloons hung around the house for a few weeks, until one night me & Jords got drunk. It started to rain. And well the rest is history.

So now we come to my ultra cool dark-rimmed specs. This pair of goggles prompted one of the mall-rats in the city to declare his undying love to me every other day while I was working. He would come up to the counter and keep banging on about how great I looked in my glasses. He was something like 7 years younger than me, but kept bugging me to give him just one chance to take me on a date to get to know him blah blah blah. Very good for the ego, and yet soooo off-putting all at once! Weird thing is I STILL see him every now & then... it's like he's EVERYWHERE. And every time he'll approach me like we're destined to be together. (We are not!) Maybe he's stalking me. Creepy! My Dad had a similar pair of glasses in the 70's... so maybe I inherited the Buddy Holly thing from him.

And now we come to the time of my sister's wedding, when it became quite apparent to me, if nobody else, that I would look like a complete tosser in the wedding photos if I was wearing my 'Buddy Goggles'! So I went for the "rim-less" style, as an act of love for my sister... who went out and found herself an identical pair for that very occasion. (As IF we needed to look any more like identical twins despite our 6 year age difference!!)

So that sort of brings me to the end of my Goggles History. 'Tis a pure joy to be able to see, without having something on my face. It is truly life-changing.

A Dream About Mia

2006-01-10T14:27:00.000+10:00

I dreamt an odd dream about my friend Maria...

I was on a bus. We were picking up people and the bus was getting quite full. Then we picked up Maria... but she was crammed in up the front, so I couldn't get to her until half of the bus had gotten off. When we finally met, I was a little surprised at her English. She couldn't speak very good English at all, which is in contrast to the wonderful grasp of the English language that she has in her writing. She was holding a big dish of some special dessert. All I can remember is it contained fruit and a caramel like dressing.

So we get to where we're going, and it turned out to be a double date... except there was another girlfriend of mine too (a 5th wheel kind of scenario). We had dinner at this little restaurant which had gone to the trouble of delivering us flowers from the guys. We thought the guys were soooo sweet, but it was actually the restaurant's doing.

Next thing I know, I'm hosting a huge dinner with family and friends. It had some theme...and the guests were standing in a wading pool filled with water and a few jellyfish and baby crocodiles. Hmmmm...

I remember a smell..I think it was the baby crocodiles..but the smell is something familiar, not a nice smell, and I haven't been able to think of what it is yet. I can still smell it even as I sit here, but I'll be damned if I can remember what it is!

So anyways...dinner was served and eaten, then Maria brought out her dessert which was a hit! And that's pretty much all I can remember...other than my Mum criticising something about my hair. Weird!

Not So Nice Nana Nap

2006-01-05T20:35:00.000+10:00

After a trip to the Optometrist today, I had to have a Nana Nap to escape the headache that was pounding away with every thought. Perhaps I should've stayed awake...

<insert dreamy music & pictures of clouds>

My Uncle Peter shows me a picture of this super duper weirdo plane. It looks like something out of Star Wars, and has a second plane mounted on top of it, like a space shuttle. I decide I need to fly in one of these planes, and so I do. (As you do.)

Next thing you know I'm sitting on this plane, with Kelly Clarkson as the chief pilot.(?) How I can see what's going on in the cockpit when I am a passenger I will never know, but I can... just go with me on this.

The Co-Pilot shows her the place she has to land this thing, and she sweats a little but has it under control. We are told to brace & prepare for the worst, but she lands the plane expertly. HOWEVER, the co-pilot jumps out and inspects where we have landed, and decides it is at great risk of rolling off this wobbly looking platform over the edge and into a dark abyss.

A safety officer comes out to check, and declares everything is fine for the passengers to get out, and promptly gives the tyres a friendly little kick, which yep you guessed it..sends the plane over the edge.

Here is where it gets interesting... I had a bit of a choice to make here. I distinctly remember asking myself if I wanted to wake up from the dream, or continue, in which case I would 'lose my stomach' as they say from the fall. I decide to stay with the dream, and we go over the edge spiralling out of control. The co-pilot chuckles and says "where did I leave the keys", and then fires up the plane and we land again somewhere else... safely.

What makes it interesting to me is I often have dreams where I'm falling (elevator..plane..whatever), and I just go with it. Everything always turns out fine.